I've discovered there are only two modes of the heart. We can struggle, or we can surrender. Surrender is a frightening word for some people, because it might be interpreted as passivity, or timidity. Surrender means wisely accommodating ourselves to what is beyond our control. Getting old, getting sick, dying, losing what is dear to us, is beyond our control. I can either be frightened of life and mad at life - or not. I can be disappointed and still not be mad. Stopping being mad - when I can - translates, for me as being compassionate - to myself as well as to other people.
Sylvia Boorstein, That's Funny you don't look Buddhist
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